The Living Years

During most of my dad's short life, I wasn't that close to him.  We got along OK, but we never said we loved each other, never hugged.  I did love him.  I did enjoy the time we spent together, especially after I left home.  But I never took advantage of what a cool guy he was when I was younger.  Part of it was the generation he grew up in.  Most guys born in the 20's weren't as affectionate to their kids as dads are today.  Part of it was how he grew up.  His folks were cold, aloof.  I am positive that he never remembered his mom or dad ever saying they loved him.  
Toward the end of his life, we did communicate more.  We spoke on the phone.  He visited Heidi and me (with my mom of course).  He and my mom came to my classroom of little ones and told stories about me to my first graders.  
I treasure that memory.  That big solid man, sitting in that itty bitty chair.  He only lived a couple months after that.  
This song came out just about that time.  And while I can't make a direct connection to everything in here - I feel these sentiments.  When I hear it, I still get misty.  It reminds me of how important it is to tell those we love how we feel.  

I was there when he died, although his spirit was already far away.  Most of my siblings were there, holding his hand, stroking his hair.  Telling him we loved him.  
Every generation
Blames the one before
And all of their frustrations
Come beating on your door

I know that I'm a prisoner
To all my Father held so dear
I know that I'm a hostage
To all his hopes and fears
I just wish I could have told him in the living years

Crumpled bits of paper
Filled with imperfect thoughts
Stilted conversations
I'm afraid that's all we've got

You say you just don't see it
He says it's perfect sense
You just can't get agreement
In this present tense
We all talk a different language
Talkin' in defense

Say it loud, say it clear
You can listen as well as you hear
It's too late when we die
To admit we don't see eye to eye

So we open up a quarrel
Between the present and the past
We only sacrifice the future
It's the bitterness that lasts

So Don't yield to the fortunes
You sometimes see as fate
It may have a new perspective
On a different date
And if you don't give up, and don't give in
You may just be O.K.

Say it loud, say it clear
You can listen as well as you hear
It's too late when we die
To admit we don't see eye to eye

I wasn't there that morning
When my Father passed away
I didn't get to tell him
All the things I had to say

I think I caught his spirit
Later that same year
I'm sure I heard his echo
In my baby's new born tears
I just wish I could have told him in the living years

Say it loud, say it clear
You can listen as well as you hear
It's too late when we die
To admit we don't see eye to eye

Say it loud, say it clear
Say it loud
Don't give up
Don't give in
And don't know what you can do next